Mother’s Day can be a fantastic day! Mother’s Day can be a terrible day! I am not sure how you feel about this holiday, but what I do know is you are loved regardless of your Mother’s Day situation.
Mother’s Day for the first 18 years of my life was a happy day. I am BEYOND blessed to have the mother that I have. She is caring, creative, hilarious, and one of the best examples of Christ’s love there is. I truly have so much to celebrate on Mother’s Day.
Then I got pregnant my senior year of high school. Then I placed my perfect, beautiful, daughter into another mother’s arms as I chose adoption for my child.
That’s when Mother’s Day became the darkest day of the year. I had a baby, but no one calls me mom? Am I a mother? During this time of the year, the word “mother” haunts me. The waiter at the restaurant asking if I am mother, the pastor at church asking all the mothers to stand up, and the friends and family who don’t know what to say. It all sucks. For the first few years, the strategy was to hide in my bed all day and have my husband bring me food and tissues. The last few years, the strategy has been to avoid social media and public and go and see my daughter for an hour or so. Well today as I write this, I start a new strategy, I am focusing on celebrating others instead of thinking of myself--- and of course I am still go see my super cute daughter, Kinley.
Today, I celebrate Bethany, my daughter’s Mom. Instead of being focused on my situation, I chose to focus on what God has done. God has given Kinley the right family. God has turned a messy situation into something so beautiful. Kinley Joy has been blessed with the best mom. Bethany is thoughtful, patient, warm, and beautiful. She has a realness and honesty that is refreshing. She instills love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, self-control, and faith into her three daughters. Bethany is a mom who is raising strong girls who will become mighty women. She makes so many sacrifices to insure that her daughters are well taken care of and well loved. She is the exact mother that Kinley needed. God knew when He made Kinley that Bethany would be her mom—the perfect fit for what Kinley needed to be who she is! I am forever grateful for the woman Bethany is, the friend I have in her, and the mother Kinley has. I celebrate Bethany today!
So I want to encourage you, regardless of how you feel, find someone to celebrate. When we focus on ourselves, it often brings more pain. Your pain is real, but there is a God who wants to trade your pain for joy. God works all things out for the good. When we are too focused on the past, we miss out on the beautiful story God is writing for us. What do you chose to focus on?